freely receive, freely give

The Lord has been teaching me so much about the importance of prayer this past week. Last Sunday I was in such a spiritual rut. I was spending all of my time praying over/for people and word-vomiting love and encouragement to anyone who would listen. It. Was. Exhausting. I spent that Monday afternoon questioning my motives and if I was correctly ‘evangelizing.’ After speaking to a couple of girls in my squad on facetime, I felt convicted of the fact that I was not seeking the Lord as my refuge. The thought of resting in the Lord daunted me. I absolutely love time in prayer and solitude with the Lord, but I struggle with seeking that daily and intentionally. However, if I am not filling myself up with the Lord’s love and spirit then there is nothing for me to give to those who are desperate to find Him. Analyzing this issue frustrated me beyond belief so I decided to ignore it all week (I suggest that you do not follow in my footsteps). 

As you could guess, the stress from ignoring my built up exhaustion blew up in my face. I felt weak in my faith because I knew I couldn’t love people if I wasn’t allowing love Himself to give me freedom. Still stuck in this frustration, I decided I needed to go to church on Saturday and spend some serious time with the Lord. I went to the front for worship and laid every single one of my stresses and questions before the father. “What does resting in you look like?” “What do I do if I dont feel worthy of your restoration?” “How do I begin to do this?” I decided it was best for me to kneel before Him and receive all that He had for me. The Lord is such a perfect gift-giver it’s insane-everything I had longed for in the past week washed over me as I allowed the father to simply love on me. I won’t get into all of the nitty-gritty details, but the Lord so beautifully taught me my worth and how to receive the overflow of His love so that I could show that compassion to others. 

Through this experience, the Lord highlighted verses to me that showed His intentions with prayer. “Truly I tell you, if you have faith and do not doubt, then you will not only do what was done to the withered fig tree but even if you tell this mountain to ‘be lifted up and thrown into the sea,’  it will be done. And if you believe, you will receive what you ask for in prayer.” (Matthew 21:18-22) If we believe, we will receive what we ask for in prayer?! Is that not the most insane thing? If we give our full trust to the Lord of the universe, He will grant us the desires of our heart. You want freedom from depression? Pray, and it will be done. You want to ask the Lord to heal your friend’s knees? He has the power to do so! You want to receive the Lord’s grace? He is anxiously waiting to bless you as we speak! Our father is such a gracious and cheerful giver. There is nothing that can stand between us and his power. He would move mountains in order to capture your heart, HE IS THAT GOOD! Just thinking about the vastness of his compassion and glory makes my heart ache in the best way possible. 

Let’s talk this through. Since the beginning of time, there has been a Lord ruling over all of the universe. This God decided that he wanted to make a planet and fill it with creation. With no point of reference, he SPOKE and everything we know came to be. This God made a man and a woman who eventually were deceived by the devil, which gave humans the ‘wisdom of God.’ This created a spiral of sinful nature, and it broke the Lord’s heart. He knew that there needed to be a sacrifice in order to pardon all sin for all eternity, so he sent his own flesh and blood to this earth. This baby, Jesus, grew up to bless this earth with signs and wonders and love. The Pharisees did not like this, so they chose to send Jesus to die on a cross. This death excused sin for every single person for all of existence. Not only that, but his sacrifice allowed the holy spirit to rest in us. IS THAT NOT THE CRAZIEST THING YOU’VE EVER HEARD???  THAT perfectly beautiful God is waiting to bless me with the desires of my heart? Absolutely ridiculous, but it is the truth.  

In Matthew 10 Jesus gives the disciples” authority over unclean spirits, to drive them out and heal every disease and sickness.” As Jesus was giving them instructions on how to do so, he told them “freely you receive, freely give.” That statement has so much beauty and power in it. Whatever you receive from the father you should work to pour that out on others in order to advance the kingdom. However, you can’t give if you don’t receive what He has waiting for you. This scripture paints such a beautiful picture of what dependence on the Lord looks like. 

My hope for all of you is that you can learn to embrace the intimacy that is available between us and the Lord. Take the opportunity you have in His name and seek Him daily! Read the word and learn for yourself how the Lord intends for you to embrace prayer. He loves you so unexplainably much! Thank you for reading this blog, I appreciate you beyond measure<3