this is a blog i’m very upset to write, so please bear with me in the midst of pain and confusion and emotion (and grammatical errors, lol).
because of the absolute MAYHEM the coronavirus has caused worldwide, the organization i am partnering with has decided to send all squads who are currently on the field home. which means, i’ll be in texas pretty soon.
i don’t know what this entails. i’m not sure when this happens or what it will look like-but i know it’s very soon and i am not happy with it.
i have all of the thoughts swirling around my head right now and not much to outwardly express, but ima try my gosh darn hardest to put words to this.
yes, this sucks, a lot. as much as it has been hard leaving india and transitioning countries, i was so incredibly excited for costa rica. i felt at peace here. my ministry was going to be incredible and my squad has been growing even more in unity & friendship. the Lord has been moving in my heart and those around us.
& now it’s cut short. i thought i had three more months with the family i’ve created since being overseas. i wish i could express how much that stings. it’s hard to look at my squad mates right now because it physically hurts thinking about leaving them. this community i’ve been living in is SPECIAL. 40 people in one place for 7 months is something i will never get again. each person beside me radically pursued the Lord, and by pursuing Him, encourages me to dive deeper into His love. i have such sweet memories with these friends. some super hard ones. some embarrassing ones. & some downright ridiculous. they were with me when i fell in the sewer and with me when i was recovering. they watched me sing potato chip countless times in india. they witnessed me stress cut bangs in thailand. many integral parts of my journey were alongside these sweet friends. it sucks!!! that the time is ending much sooner than i thought.
i am choosing to find joy in this. to seek after God’s comfort, peace, and mercy in a world of fear, chaos, and uncertainty. i am undeniably shocked and sad, but PRAISE, my Heavenly Father is the King of kings and has all of this in the palms of His hands. i overheard one of my squad mates saying that He knew we were going to be overseas as the corona chaos was happening. He knew we would get sent home, and He knew it would suck. but He takes every scheme of the enemy and stomps on it. He takes every sliver of pain and suffering & breathes life into it. so, ya girl is gonna be seekin after the Lord’s perspective in the midst of confusion. prayers that i would be consistent in seeking refuge in Him.
to my supporters, y’all for real rock. you rock SO HARD. i hope i get to sit across a table with each one of you one day and tell you all of the stories that you played a part in making possible. without your donations and kindness, i would not have been able to live the best 7 months of my life. thank you thank you THANK YOU for everything. words cannot fully describe my gratitude.
ill be writing more blogs when i get back to the states. i have so many stories i want to share, now just isn’t the time for my brain to gather up the strength to recall them. have grace for me in this time of grieving the end of my race. i love you all. thank you for the continued prayers and support throughout this.
as always, all the love. <3 nol
So sorry to hear this, I feel you! As believers, we dont walk in fear and are to be led by the spirit not by the things of this world. In times of trouble we are to be the light and show hope and victory over these these things. Where are the believers? The ones who live in union with Christ that have the spirit that heals the sick, delivers the oppressed and teaches the GOOD news of the gospel. Why are we bowing down and giving into the chaos and the fear? Did the spirit tell us to hunker down and be safe? Or are we following man and being controlled by the circumstances? Rise up Children of God and realize the union we have with Christ and hear what He is speaking to us and walk by faith. This is what the world needs! So your disappointment is understandable and I pray you continue on no matter where you end up. Love you!
Wish I could put my arms around you now. I grieve with you but I also believe that God does not make mistakes. He brings beauty from ashes. Love you so much. Grandma
Noelle, I am so sorry that your trip has been cut short and all your hopes and expectations for Costa Rica have been crushed. I loved seeing your enthusiasm and your love for the kids when you played with them in India. Maybe you can find solace in a comment that a fellow racer posted; that your trip hasn’t ended, but merely been rerouted, and you can be salt and light in the situations where God puts you when you come home.
I wish you God’s peace, and may you be a blessing to everyone in your sphere of influence upon your return.
Dude- that’s tough. I am incredibly sad for you, I won’t lie. Thanks for this blog and being honest about how you’re feeling about it. You rock and I love you, bud.
Although this is not what anyone wanted, God has a plan. Hang in there.
Safe travels home…